Lessons learnt

The past week has been one of many, many lessons learnt. It had a very low point, which thankfully transformed in a life lesson that I hope to use when my children encounter a similar situation, and it had three very high points that I am very thankful for.

Let’s forget about the low point – I will not waste energy on that further.

The high points? I was asked and allowed to be a speaker at a ladies tea where I spoke about invisible women. The Afrikaans version is on the blog under the title ‘Onsigbare vroue’. (I am in the process of translating it, should any of my English speaking friends want to read it.) The second high preceded the first and happened on the day of the low – shows you how things cancel each other out. I was published (sans the fee, but still published!!!) on an online magazine. Twice in one week! How’s that! The one article was shared about 3500 times via Facebook. And thát is where the lessons learnt came from – third high point – the lessons learnt.

I learnt that when you are a writer/speaker it does not really matter what people think about what you have written. They are not inside your head when you write your piece. They do not see you smile at the recalling of the memories, neither do they see you cry when you pour your heart out on the keyboard. You try your best to show them through your words what it is that you are trying to convey, and if you are successful they are able to see it and can relate. Or you may find them lashing out at you. For the keyboard and the anonymity of a computer screen is a powerful thing. It makes usually peaceful people become Goliaths, who bully and threaten, who do not think about the words that they are typing in their anger, frustration, powerlessness and insecurity. People who will praise you when face to face with you and then turn around, morphing into a werewolf with blood dripping from their fangs after they have slaughtered you with their words.

I realised that my work as a writer/speaker is to do what I have been gifted to do – write and speak. If you understand the concept of speaking things into being – that is what I am doing. It is pretty much like the 3d pen that you get – you get the idea, you draw it, you pick it up and you walk away… or you chuck it, your choice.

This past week I realised that people will have opinions, (which is defined by the Oxford Advanced Learner’s Dictionary as ‘your feelings or thoughts about something, rather than fact, the beliefs or views of a group of people), but that is just what they are – FEELINGS OR THOUGHTS ABOUT SOMETHING, RATHER THAN FACT. And if you know me well enough, which few do, you will know that I know something much more important as well – that there is a vast difference between the TRUTH and FACTS, because not all facts are the truth… facts can change, but the TRUTH can’t. (That on the other hand is a discussion for another day.)

Dear reader of my writings,

It gives me great pleasure when you enjoy what I have written. I love positive remarks. I also have no issue when you respectfully disagree from what I have written – I have enough self respect and humility to understand that we are all different and I may be able to learn from you when you tell me why you disagree from me.

But, when you write a comment that is drawn from your anger, frustration, fear, insecurities, and whatever else remember that I have not asked for your opinion, and quite frankly, I do not care for it. It will not determine whether or not I keep on writing or speaking.

Do I need to remind you what happened to Goliath? There was a little stone in a slingshot called “delete”.

The third high point stands out much more than the other two, because with it came freedom.

May you experience that today.

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